(Don't) Get in Touch
Should you feel the compulsion to contact me, I would urge you to reconsider, for both our sakes.
If, however, you cannot be dissuaded, I suppose I have no choice but to include my contact information here. For, left to your own devices, I'll no doubt to be subjected to far more unpleasant methods of communication.
☎️ (...it would be better if you didn't) Call me
If that isn't enough (you're insatiable) I suppose you can risk filling your information in on this form. It's unclear what will happen if you do...